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Empty Nest Syndrome You know what it is, you don't need me to tell you that. You feel it, you experience it, you suffer it. It feels like a kind of bereavement and so it is. You have lost what has been familiar in your life for a long time and now you have all that TIME. What to do with all that time on your hands. People say get a hobby, do something else, get some other interests. Doesn't really help does it? The empty space forces change on you and people don't like change very much. Problem is you now have so much time in which to think and you find you can't think very straight. Maybe all those stresses and things which you buried for years begin to surface:
You are at home trying to cope with the changes that seem to have been forced upon you whilst the children are getting on with their lives. They don't suffer in the way that you do - they are getting on with living whilst you feel that a part of you is dying. Other people seem to manage it and get on with their lives saying things about their children like, "Glad to see the back of them. Peace at last." What you really would like to do is talk about it. Counselling is your opportunity to talk about your stuff, whatever it is that's going on in your life that you want to make sense of and take control of. Most people are not used to thinking about themselves and their own emotional reactions let alone talking about them or understanding them, no matter what sex they are. Talking to friends and relations is not quite the same thing as they will always have their own agenda and so may well finish your thoughts, sentences, for you before you have had a chance to fully understand them yourself and almost always with their own bias adding their own bits of good 'advice'. You may feel frustrated that they are not really understanding you or get what you are on about. On the other hand you may fear that they are judging you and forming misunderstood opinions about you and this will inhibit your exploration and progress. With over 30years of experience I am a good listener but will ask you the odd question from time to time to nudge/help you along in your exploration of yourself. Your session with me will last about 1.1/2 hours. This may seem like an awful long time but you will be amazed at how fast the time slips by. This way of working negates the stop-start hourly method that most counsellors/therapists use and much more can be achieved immediately. In your session with me we keep going giving you the chance to really get your thoughts and feelings in order and begin to make sense of them. The session will find its own natural resolution and it is my experience over the years that this falls somewhere around 1.1/2 hours. Most, but not all, sessions end with hypnotherapy for relaxation and dealing with the physical side-effects of stress and anxiety clearing your mind to be better able to cope with your issues and bring them to a satisfactory conclusion. Many clients have commented afterwards that it was the best 'chill-out' they have ever had. You will leave the session with a much clearer understanding of yourself together with tools that you can use to be in control of your life and to be creative in determining your future.
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© Neil Robinson 2022 |
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